In
order
to
avoid
any
confusion
or
heartbreak
down
the
road,
Corliss
Thomas
has
learned
that
it’s
best
to
share
some
fairly
personal
information
with
anyone
with
whom
he
might
be
interested
in
starting
something
romantic.
“The
guys
I
date
are
always
surprised
when
I
tell
them
I’m
a
top,”
said
Thomas,
who
describes
his
look
as
a
blend
of
punk
rock
and
hip
hop.
“I
like
to
be
different,
and
I
like
that
I’m
different
from
what
people
might
assume
of
me.
“This
is
an
expression
of
me,
and
yeah,
it’s
femme
and
glittery,”
he
added.
“That
doesn’t
mean
this
is
all
of
me
or
that
all
of
me
is
femme.
It
doesn’t
mean
that
I’m
trying
to
be
a
woman
or
that
I
want
to
play
the
woman’s
role
in
the
bedroom.”
Even
in
a
city
with
a
gay
population
as
large
as
Atlanta’s,
so
many
aspects
of
gay
sexuality
continue
to
be
marginalized
or
derided.
And
although
many
gay
men
in
Atlanta
enjoy
being
penetrated
during
sex,
the
term
“bottom”
is
often
used
as
a
slur
the
same
way
that
“gay”
is
used
on
school
playgrounds.
“They
think
you’re
soft,
or
femme,
or
you
don’t
know
how
to
use
your
dick,”
said
a
31-year-old
Atlanta
resident
who
asked
to
be
identified
as
“Greg.”
“I
know
that’s
not
what
all
bottoms
are,
but
that’s
what
people
think,”
said
Greg,
who
is
usually
the
receptive
partner
during
anal
sex,
but
doesn’t
identify
as
a
bottom.
“I
am
versatile,
and
I
do
know
how
to
use
my
dick,
so
I’m
not
lying.
But
saying
I’m
versatile
might
keep
people
from
assuming
all
these
other
things
about
me,
just
because
I
like
to
get
fucked.”
Greg
had
been
sleeping
with
men
for
years
before
he
was
first
penetrated
during
anal
sex,
mainly
because
of
his
fears
about
the
physical
pain.
The
first
time
he
bottomed
was
a
bittersweet
experience.
“It
was
kind
of
exciting
because
I
had
gotten
past
that
fear,
or
pain,
or
whatever
it
was
that
kept
me
from
doing
it
before,”
he
said.
“I
was
excited
and
kind
of
actually
giddy,
but
it
wasn’t
something
that
I
wanted
to
rush
out
and
tell
all
of
my
friends.
There
were
a
few
I
wanted
to
share
with,
but
I
remember
being
not
sure
they
would
look
at
me
different.”
The
stigma
around
bottoming
makes
no
sense
to
Daniel
Wright.
“You
figure
for
every
two
gay
people
in
a
relationship,
at
least
one
of
them
is
going
to
be
a
bottom
so
it’s
not
rocket
science
— it’s
part
of
the
life,”
Wright
said.
So
does
that
mean
that
50
percent
of
gay
men
in
Atlanta
are
bottoms?
“Oh,
it’s
probably
a
little
higher
than
that,”
Wright
said
with
a
laugh.
“Many
people
don’t
have
family
down
here,
and
so
we’re
naturally
freer.
I
know
I
wanted
to
try
the
whole
menu
when
I
got
here,
and
I
think
that’s
a
common
sensation
that
Atlanta
provides.”
The
assumption
that
the
bottom
partner
is
weaker
is
also
inaccurate,
Wright
said.
“Bottoms
have
just
as
much
control
over
everything,
if
not
more,”
he
said.
“If
he
doesn’t
relax
and
let
the
top
in,
that’s
the
end
of
the
story.”
Animosity
toward
bottoms
can
be
particularly
pronounced
among
black
gay
men,
said
a
41-year
old
man
named
“Donald.”
“A
bottom
is
someone
who
is
seen
as
weak
or
girly,”
Donald
said.
“It’s
like
one
more
thing
that
you
have
to
defend
about
yourself,
that
people
are
going
to
try
to
use
against
you
to
make
you
feel
bad
about
who
you
are.
“The
worst
part
is
that
it’s
the
bottoms
that
are
the
most
hateful
toward
other
bottoms,
[saying],
‘Oh
he’s
nothing
but
a
big
old
bottom,’
or
‘He’s
just
a
lady
with
muscles,’”
Donald
said.
“It
kills
me.
Part
of
it
may
be
competition.
It’s
just
one
more
bottom
to
compete
with
when
that
12-inch
thing
comes
along.”
Thomas
agreed
that
bottoms
can
be
unforgiving
in
their
judgment.
“I
have
had
bottoms
tell
me
I’m
too
femme
to
fuck
them,”
Thomas
said.
“I
think
Atlanta
is
really
hung
up
on
labels
and
that’s
not
good.
We
have
all
these
gay
people
here,
different
types
of
gay
people,
and
yet
we
want
everyone
to
fit
into
a
box.
Why
not
let
people
be
who
they
are?”
The
following comments were posted by our readers and were
not edited by SOVO. We ask that you
treat others with respect; any post deemed offensive will
be removed.
MORE LOCAL
Celebrating a King
Coretta Scott King reflection, Rick Warren protest part of gay MLK activities
Let freedom dance
Gay, lesbian promoters plan big parties for MLK weekend
Free Gary Wayne Carriker!
Overzealous Georgia prosecutors ignorant of even the basics of gay sex have secured a 10-year jail sentence for a gay man for the crime of being HIV-positive.
