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| Charis Books & More — owned by Linda Bryant, Cherie Lyons and Sara Look — hosts a party Aug. 17 celebrating couples who have been together 20 years or more. (Photo by R.O. Youngblood) |
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HOME > COMMUNITY > COMMUNITY FEATURE
By: PENNY WHITE
COMMENTS |
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When Linda Bryant learned that friends Marlene Johnson and Brooke Hopkins didn’t
have plans to celebrate their 25th anniversary, she decided to step in.
“They weren’t sure,” said Bryant, co-owner of Charis Books & More. “So
I suggested we have a celebration here at the bookstore and we’ll honor
all couples we can find who have been together 20 years or more.”
At least seven couples will join Johnson and Hopkins in the spotlight at Charis
on Aug. 17, with an open invitation to help celebrate their decades of togetherness.
“I think it’s a great idea and a great way to celebrate long-term
relationships,” Johnson said. “I have friends who have been together
for 30 or 40-something years and I wish there was a way to celebrate that kind
of longevity.”
JOHNSON AND HOPKINS met on the job. Hopkins worked at the Salvation Army as
director for prevention of juvenile delinquency. Johnson interviewed for a
job as a counselor and Hopkins hired her.
From that point, they became friends for about a year.
“We didn’t really know about each other, but one thing led to
another and we ended up together,” Johnson said.
Friendship is a key element to the couple’s longevity.
“I think relationships are really difficult. Once the beginning spark
of infatuation fades, you really need a firm foundation,” Johnson said.
Shared values also help keep the couple together.
“I think some of the reasons we’ve been together all these years
is that we share the same values and belief system, we share a sense of commitment
and we trust and respect each other,” Johnson said.
A great sense of humor also helps, much in evidence from the banter in the
background as Johnson discussed their relationship.
“We’ve always had the ability to make each other laugh,” Johnson
said, as Hopkins teased her about her pronunciation of words like “daughter.”
The two had been together for eight years when they decided to adopt. They
completed a private adoption in the 1970s, a time when lesbian parenting was
neither commonplace nor fodder for media discussion.
“Learning how to resolve conflict was one of the challenges we faced,” Johnson
said. “Learning how to parent was another challenge because we have different
parenting styles.”
Their distinctive personalities create something of a balance, with Johnson
being a therapist who knows lots of people and Hopkins being somewhat shy.
But “she’s super mom,” Johnson said, as Hopkins laughed in
the background.
The two have seen definite changes in gay life in their quarter century together.
They applaud the increase in lesbian parenting, but one of the things they
miss is attending women’s music festivals.
Both Johnson and Hopkins said they loved going to RhythmFest, a now-defunct
festival held in the Southeast.
“Our daughter grew up going to that,” Johnson said. “We’ve
been to [the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival] a few times, but we really
miss RhythmFest.”
Gay Pride parades have also changed.
“The first one we went to must have been about a 100 people,” Johnson
said. “Now it’s some mega-number.”
THE COUPLE initially planned to have a celebration for their 10th anniversary.
But it soon became a “planning” thing, they said.
“Our friends kept asking us when we were going to have a party,” Johnson
said. “We’re not really party people. So we kept saying we would
have one on our 10th anniversary, then on our 12th, 14th, 15th and 20th.”
When they started saying they would have a celebration for their 25th anniversary,
Bryant finally suggested the party at Charis, along with making it public and
open to other long-term couples.
“It is a way to encourage long-term relationships within our community,” Bryant
said. “Just as couples in the hetero world get celebrated all the time
by friends and family for their milestones.”
The idea of the celebration received a warm response, Bryant said.
“People are thrilled to find out there are people in the community who
have been together for a really long time,” she said. “You never
know what will come out of it in terms of what connections are made.”
Charis asks the long-term couples in attendance to bring photographs of themselves
in their early courting days and a piece of music from their first year together.
“We’ll have music and cake and photographs. It will be a party
atmosphere,” Bryant said.
Aug. 17, 6 p.m.
Charis Books & More
1189 Euclid Ave. NE
404-524-0304
www.chariscircle.org
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